Whether it’s third trimester back pain, a wailing newborn at 2 a.m. or racing thoughts just as you’re settling into bed, inadequate sleep can impact your pregnancy, physical healing and postpartum mental health.
Sleep deprivation can make you less likely to think logically, less tolerant of stressors, and not as present as you’d like to be.
The good news is there are strategies to help you start sleeping better as soon as tonight!
TAG-TEAM SLEEP CYCLES WITH YOUR PARTNER
In this scenario, partners trade off sleep and baby care shifts with each other. For example, your partner could be the “team lead” on attending to baby’s needs from 10 p.m. to 2 a.m. while you sleep. Then from 2 a.m. to 6 a.m., you take the lead while your partner sleeps. This gives each partner the potential for four hours of uninterrupted sleep.
Of course, the night won’t always go exactly as planned, and you may occasionally have to get up and assist when it isn’t your care shift, but the overall goal is to give each other as much uninterrupted sleep as possible during each shift.
PRIORITIZE LARGE CHUNKS OF SLEEP
During sleep, your body cycles through several rounds of rapid eye movement (REM) and non-REM sleep, both of which help your body restore and heal itself. If you wake every hour, you aren’t reaping the benefits of that REM sleep! Try to consolidate your sleep into longer chunks whenever you can. Even if you wind up getting less sleep overall, the sleep you are getting will be more restorative because you are falling into those deeper cycles.
SLEEP WHEN BABY SLEEPS ... WHENEVER POSSIBLE
This isn’t always as easy as it sounds. Your anxiety might be higher when baby sleeps. You might feel compelled to clean when baby sleeps. You might prefer to use this time to journal, watch your favorite show, talk with other adults, shower, etc. But if you are feeling tired after baby goes down, then try to prioritize sleep over other activities.
BE FLEXIBLE WITH FEEDINGS
Whether you are breastfeeding, exclusively pumping or formula feeding, work toward flexible thinking with feeding so that others can assist. For example, you can pump during the day and let a partner or support person feed pumped milk overnight.
If pumping isn’t possible, you may consider giving baby one bottle of formula overnight to protect your sleep. (Note: After about a month, baby is significantly less likely to struggle with nipple confusion and reject breastfeeding in favor of bottle feeding.)
If a bottle is not possible or preferred, you can still enlist support people to help with feeding. For example:
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Baby wakes. Your partner gets the baby and changes their diaper while you get yourself situated and ready to feed.
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While nursing, allow your partner to assist with proper latch, emotional support, arranging pillows, bringing you water, etc.
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After you finish nursing, your partner can burp, re-swaddle and put baby back to bed.
AVOID “TRYING” TO SLEEP WHEN YOU CAN’T
As a new or expectant parent, anxious thoughts flood your mind when you’re trying to sleep that result in tossing and turning. Frustration increases, which keeps you even more wakeful. Your brain may start to associate your bed as the place to feel anxious.
If you are having difficulty falling asleep, get out of bed, go to a different room, and engage in calm or low stimulation activities. Keep the lights and sounds low. When you start to feel tired again, return to bed and try again.
CALMING TECHNIQUES
Incorporate any of the following relaxation techniques into your nighttime routine or (use some of them to fall back asleep):
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Meditation apps
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Journaling
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Progressive Muscle Relaxation
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Deep breathing and/or mindfulness meditation
ADDITIONAL SLEEPING CONSIDERATIONS FOR NEW PARENTS
It is common for your sleep quality to worsen if baby’s bassinet/crib is in your room.
You may get better sleep with baby sleeping in their own room, if you are comfortable with this. However, don't attempt if separating from baby makes you more anxious.
During baby’s nighttime feeds or nighttime wake periods …
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Keep the lights off or as dim as possible—use the light from a hallway, nearby bathroom or closet with the door cracked.
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Keep talking to a minimal and voices calm.
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Interact with baby, but in a calm, low stimulation manner.
Always maintain safe sleep practices for baby.
Safe sleep practices, as provided by Michigan Department of Health and Human Services, is for baby to sleep on their back, in their own crib alone, with no blankets, pillows, bumper pads, toys or other objects.
Sarah DeYoung is a Licensed Clinical Master Social Worker at Pine Rest Christian Mental Health Services. She specializes in Perinatal Mood and Anxiety Disorders.
Courtesy of Pine Rest Christian Mental Health Services.
